You’re probably head over heels in love with that guy but a tiny part of your heart tells you something – you’re being played. You’re not paying attention because love covers all. Maybe you even go as far as telling yourself it’s the devil that is trying to confuse you. For the purpose of this post, let’s assume it’s not the devil, let’s assume you’re actually getting played and let’s go past that tiny thing in your heart.
If your man has been doing these five things among others, then you might have to start asking him a few questions:
1. He goes off the grid for days or weeks: And never returns with a cogent or logical explanation. He suddenly becomes unreachable and unavailable, his phone lines are switched off, his friends cannot account for his whereabouts, worse off, you haven’t really met his parents so you can’t call them to check. This goes on for days and when you finally get through, he gives you a story that doesn’t exactly make sense but still tells you to thank God for his life and safe return. Sister, that brother is up to no good.
2. He has thousands of female friends and flaunts them on social media: He says to you, “oh they’re just friends and there’s nothing between me and any of them”. Brother, are you a coach? Do you manage a female music band? No one says your man shouldn’t have friends but going as far as showing them off on his Instagram with cryptic captions is a problem and you should be worried.
3. His stories never match: This dude must have given you a story about his past when you both just met but months into the relationship when you go over the same conversation, the details change. That’s a clear sign he lies. If it happens more than once then maybe you need to call him out to his face. Or better still, choose silence and make your own plans. A man who lies consistently is capable of doing even worse.
4. When the marriage conversation arises: He has no definite plans, he’s one of those men whose favourite lines are vision2020, vision2030 etc. But the truth is he has plans to get married soon, he just doesn’t want to marry you. On other days when his guards are down, he spills on and on about how his parents are putting pressure on him for marriage. On the other hand, he has everything he needs to settle down and start a family but insists to you that he’s not ready. Maybe you need to read between the lines? You’re probably just getting played.
5. He only meets you at his friends’ apartment: So he has never considered inviting you to his parent’s home (if he still lives with them). The normal rendezvous is that friend’s place and you feel like he’s hiding you but don’t want to complain. Dear sister, he’s playing you. You need to start asking questions or making moves to get out of that relationship.